Treatment of Parents
Youths
Asked on 19th April 2021
Question
Assalamualaikum Sheikh
I have a father who is not soft hearted but other people think him to be kind(I thought I was mistaken but he really is not kind to me), he always commands me, doesn't strive for knowledge(tells me to strive so that he gets the ajar) and views me as a trophy instead of his son. My mother is a kind soul but majority of the times she tries guilt tripping and uses little of her common sense while speaking and shouts at me when I say it's not right. Help me cause Birr Al walidain is real and I can't cut my kith and kin but if I keep entertaining these people I may pretty soon go into depression
Answer
Assalamualaikum Sheikh
I have a father who is not soft hearted but other people think him to be kind(I thought I was mistaken but he really is not kind to me), he always commands me, doesn't strive for knowledge(tells me to strive so that he gets the ajar) and views me as a trophy instead of his son. My mother is a kind soul but majority of the times she tries guilt tripping and uses little of her common sense while speaking and shouts at me when I say it's not right. Help me cause Birr Al walidain is real and I can't cut my kith and kin but if I keep entertaining these people I may pretty soon go into depression
Wa'alaykumsalaam Wa Rahmatullah.
Yes, you are right to be striving to please them for the sake of Allah. I ask Allah to make it easy on you and reward you loads for it.
What i can advice is to take it easy. Whatever Ibaadah you are doing, it is for you. They will be rewarded as well but remember, you are the doer of it and you are rewarded more.
There are times when you may sit down and have a conversation with your parents. There are times where they are not aware of your maturity growth. They may appreciate such a conversation and have a different attitude towards you.
The best thing is to supplicate to Allah to make things clear and easy for you in shaa Allah. Keep up the respect of your parents as they are your key to Jannah. Be Patient and do not give up. Ask Allah for support.
if this is leading towards depression, then we may take it to another level in shaa Allah. Shukran
I have a father who is not soft hearted but other people think him to be kind(I thought I was mistaken but he really is not kind to me), he always commands me, doesn't strive for knowledge(tells me to strive so that he gets the ajar) and views me as a trophy instead of his son. My mother is a kind soul but majority of the times she tries guilt tripping and uses little of her common sense while speaking and shouts at me when I say it's not right. Help me cause Birr Al walidain is real and I can't cut my kith and kin but if I keep entertaining these people I may pretty soon go into depression
Wa'alaykumsalaam Wa Rahmatullah.
Yes, you are right to be striving to please them for the sake of Allah. I ask Allah to make it easy on you and reward you loads for it.
What i can advice is to take it easy. Whatever Ibaadah you are doing, it is for you. They will be rewarded as well but remember, you are the doer of it and you are rewarded more.
There are times when you may sit down and have a conversation with your parents. There are times where they are not aware of your maturity growth. They may appreciate such a conversation and have a different attitude towards you.
The best thing is to supplicate to Allah to make things clear and easy for you in shaa Allah. Keep up the respect of your parents as they are your key to Jannah. Be Patient and do not give up. Ask Allah for support.
if this is leading towards depression, then we may take it to another level in shaa Allah. Shukran